When Has A Stark Ever Been 'Normal?
by nvzblgrrl
Summary: Tony Stark really should not have been given custody of a child, no matter what the circumstances. Billionaire, playboy, weapons manufacturer were three things that did not serve as qualifiers, yet, here the kid was. Now if only the kid would stop playing with the kitchen knives whenever Obie visited. One-Shot (?)
1. Sharp

**Based on a persistent plot bunny that keeps kicking at my head (how would being a single parent affect being a big brain in the Marvel Universe?)**

**Of course, Tony Stark would be the one I pick to appease the rabbit.**

* * *

><p>Tony Stark raised an eyebrow as he scanned over the information on the page. "Agni? Who names a kid Agni?"<p>

"Are you sure it isn't 'Agnes'?" Pepper asked, even as she organized the paternity papers. Apparently, of all the confirmed illegitimate Starks, this one was getting turned over to Tony as of 'yesterday', which she took to mean as the ability to take annoying people up to an art form being genetic.

"No, it's Agni, with an 'I'." Tony unlocked his smartphone, quickly accessing Google. "'Agnes' is an old person name, so small saving grace there." He paused for a moment as he read an entry on a name website. "Okay, still a weird name, but I'll admit, kinda cool too."

"What's it mean?"

"Egg." He smirked as she rolled her eyes at him. "No, it means 'sword's edge'. Very…"

"Stark-like?"

"I was going to say 'cool', but that works too."

* * *

><p>Pepper looks over at the little girl again– really, that's the only word for her, so small she barely comes up to Tony's hip – and feels nothing but apprehension. Six-year old girls who barely come up to Tony's hip should not be giving her nerves as bad as a first job interview.<p>

But Pepper figures that Agni Blake isn't like most little girls.

There are bits and pieces of Tony Stark in Agni Blake that Pepper can see just by looking at her; the big brown eyes, the naturally messy look (the hair, oh dear god, did the girl cut her hair herself with a blunt knife…), the deceptive intelligence that the school reports say is there but barely surfaces during the conversation, the vague frown that is Tony's general 'resting' expression, but there are other things that don't match.

Agni was the very portrait of the quiet type. That was a distinctly un-Tony thing, but Pepper figured that she could live with single sentence answers.

"What do you think of all this?" She asked a few minutes after the private jet had taken off.

Agni didn't bother to tear her gaze away from the window. "Too high." She said, even as she watched the clouds slowly fall beneath their cruising height.

"I meant… leaving your family." They hadn't exactly been slow about signing over custody.

This breaks her eyes away from the window, bringing those shiny brown Stark eyes around to lazily focus on Pepper. "Eh."

"That's… too bad." Pepper pulled out her tablet, absently checking her e-mail. Surprisingly empty for once. "What do you think of Tony?"

"Don't know." The eyes are back on the sea of clouds and that conversation topic is ended.  
>This, Pepper decided, was going to be a long flight.<p>

* * *

><p>Tony doesn't know what a normal kid is supposed to be like and thus is much less weirded out by his new charge. Pepper only has to open the door and there's a still warm pizza on the counter (from New York, so he either remembered his new kid or completely forgot) and Tony's actually there with his feet up on the couch watching… cartoons.<p>

Pepper almost scolds him, but Agni's already over there, perched on the recliner by the sofa. Tony offers her a slice of pizza and Agni Blake officially (as much as can be done without a piece of paper and a signature) becomes a Stark.

After the both fall asleep, still on their respective pieces of furniture, Agni drooling into the armrest while Tony manages to make being upside down look completely comfortable, Pepper takes a picture.

She frames it, and it takes a place on Tony's personal work desk, right next to the picture of him and his dad.

It never leaves.

* * *

><p>Tony Stark might not be a good role model, but Pepper can see after the first month that, despite Tony's occasional worries about 'breaking his shiny new kid', there was no way that he'd actually manage to drive Agni off. The two, almost in spite of their differences, just clicked, and if JARVIS comments on it within the first week, it is, indeed, something that was just meant to be.<p>

The little girl actually talks now, mostly to Tony, JARVIS, and the other bots, but Pepper starts getting actual conversations instead of one sentence responses. Obadiah, on the other hand, despite his cajoling and 'kindly uncle' persona getting cranked up to eleven, would get nothing other than a blank, almost accusatory stare.

Tony starts making jokes about his kid being an evil-detecting robot. A month later, he finds something else to kid about. A year later, he finds out that Obadiah was backstabbing him. Thirty seconds after that, it's Obadiah who's getting stabbed in the back.

A year after that, the robot part of the joke comes back to bite him in the ass.

* * *

><p>It's a two days after they filed the paperwork to officially bring Agni under the Stark banner that the media descends on the information like a hawk.<p>

Too bad Agni's not a mouse.

Tony has JARVIS save the recordings, because there aren't many times that one sees a reporter get rendered speechless, especially by a six-year old girl.

* * *

><p>Tony Stark goes missing in Afghanistan.<p>

Obadiah smiles to himself, even as he starts thinking about how to turn this in his favor.

Pepper tries to keep herself and her end of Stark Industries afloat.

Agni waits for her dad to come back.

* * *

><p>Three months later, Tony Stark comes back.<p>

Obadiah slips back into his 'Obie-Wan' role like nothing is wrong.

Pepper falls back into step at Tony's side, bringing him up to speed.

Agni falls asleep on the couch with her dad that night, happy for the first time in months.

* * *

><p>Tony stared down at his chest, even as his daughter tapped the glass of the arc reactor rhythmically. The sounds come in staggered sets, a sharp note followed by a softer one, and something about it sounds familiar.<p>

"Yeah, that's what's keeping me alive right now." He had explained, even as Agni had stared into the blue glow. That was five minutes ago, and she was still staring into it, though the tapping was new.

He shifts to a more comfortable part of the couch and Agni looks up at him, the light of the arc reactor illuminating her face ominously.

"It's a good blue." She says, having apparently come to a decision on the subject.

Whatever that was supposed to mean, Tony decides to roll with it. "Thanks. Made it myself."

Agni hums and taps it again. "Doesn't feel done yet. But it's got a good heart."

Tony doesn't really know what to say to that.

* * *

><p>Rhodey knows that Tony Stark's doing a secret project in the basement.<p>

Pepper knows that Tony Stark's doing a secret project in the basement.

Agni knows that Tony Stark's doing a secret project in the basement.

Obadiah knows that Tony Stark's doing a secret project in the basement.

SHIELD knows that Tony Stark's doing a secret project in the basement.

The whole world knows that Tony Stark's doing a secret project in the basement.

Because, a) he's Tony Stark, b) Tony Stark is always doing something, and c) he's in the basement, where all of his secret projects take place. Plus, there's a great big honking hole in the roof.

He's not that great at hiding that he has secrets. The hole that starts in the roof and goes all the way through to the basement is proof of that.

He is good at making sure that nobody finds out what those secrets are.

* * *

><p>Obadiah rebuilt the first set of armor to his specs after he pried the remains of the original from Raza's cold, dead hands. When it came time to get the power source, he didn't hesitate to break into Tony's home, paralyze him, and tear it out of his chest.<p>

Agni didn't hesitate to grab two of the biggest knives in the kitchen and ventilate Obadiah's back. Vigorously and repeatedly, until the traitor stops breathing.

Tony didn't have any choice but to stare at the pulverized body of his father figure as his daughter gently pushed the arc reactor back into place with bloody bright-red hands, leaving smears of Obadiah's blood over the glowing blue glass.

Rhodey doesn't have any choice but to freak out when he walks in on the scene and Agni turns that panicking into a desire to hide the body.

Agent Coulson really wishes that someone else was stuck handling the Stark situation when he walks in on the scene of a still freaking out Rhodey and a blood-soaked six year old trying to haul a corpse out of Stark's living room.

For some reason, he lets them dispose of the body. But he still tells Fury.


	2. Awesome

**I like the idea of Tony getting saddled with the responsibility of parenthood. ANOTHER! *SMASH*  
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* * *

><p>Four months after Obadiah and three after the government gets another eyeful of the Iron Man suit that leaves then clamoring for their own shiny toys, Tony's working on figuring out how to cheat death again (with little success), when it happens.<p>

A buck-ass nude teenager with a mess of tangled brown-black hair materializes out of nowhere in middle of his lab and starts grinning like an idiot.

"Who the hell are you?" This, in Tony Stark's mind, is an appropriate response.

"Sir, the intruder spontaneously began to exist one minute ago." JARVIS murmurs. "And I am detecting trace amounts of –"

The boy, really that's the only word for guy who can look that goddamn puppy-level excited over appearing naked in a strange place in front of one of the most influential men on the planet. "Oh. My name's Andy." He blanked for a second and then grinned. "Oh good; it worked! Awesome!"

Tony blinked and shrugged, even as he focused on the kid's face. "Alright, Andy. Why… and how… are you in my lab?... And what worked?"

"Time travel experiment!" Andy chirped as he bounced again. "And… it… worked!"

"That's why you don't have clothes, right?" Tony fought the urge to facepalm. He does not want to deal with a nudist time traveler right now.

"Yeah, Dad said it'd be like Terminator, so I got naked." Andy blanked for a moment, eyes dulling for a split second before returning to a normal focus. "Oh, wait, he was laughing when he said that." He sat down on the floor. "Do you have any pants I can wear?"

Tony did facepalm at that.

* * *

><p>Turns out he has a kid from the future, if the DNA he had JARVIS pull from one of Andy's hairs has anything to say about it. Really, once he heard the 'Terminator' joke, he had kinda guessed.<p>

Thankfully, Andy is useful, smart, and just plain weird enough to get into Tony's social circles without the excuse of being a blood relation. Agni doesn't question it, ignoring the new addition to their family and JARVIS just sorts him in with Dummy, Butterfingers, and You.

Tony is three parts irritated and one part touched by how hovery the kid is, always asking his 'Dad' if he's doing okay. He's being poisoned by the arc reactor that's keeping him alive, which is so far removed from okay that it's not even funny in the ironic sense.

Of course, the fact that Andy exists and apparently works with Tony in the future (or a future, Tony mentally adds, given the kind of traction Reed Richard's multiverse theory had since he kept visiting a new universe every other week) is a fair indicator of survival. Somehow.

Tony wonders if Andy knows what his future-self replaced the palladium with. He asks.

Andy asks if he's asking about Starkium.

Tony asks if he's joking.

Andy neither confirms or denies, only grinning and giggling as he starts moving some equipment.

* * *

><p>"So, you're telling me that between Jarvis, your robots, and your stab-happy, special needs murder child, you decided to pick up a lunatic who thinks that he's a time traveler?" Rhodey pinched the bridge of his nose.<p>

Tony snorted. "When you say it like that, you make it sound like I'm trying to start a superhero team."

Within the year, Tony Stark joins a superhero team and Rhodey takes an hour to yell at him for that.

* * *

><p>It's in Monaco that Tony gets a niggling feeling of Andy really is capable of.<p>

Vanko, Whiplash, whatever, just sliced through his race car with his electric whips, and while Tony knows that a car made up of fiberglass and lightweight metal usually can't stand up to powered armor of any stripe, human flesh does not outstrip the two in the durability department.

Yet Andy has one of the whips wrapped around his arm like it's a minor annoyance, even as his skin fizzles under it. There's no grin now, no giggling, just… blank. Just like an Iron Man mask, blankly serious, even as he takes over the situation, catching the second whip without a sideways glance. He pulls, and Tony cognitively knows that it shouldn't do anything between Vanko's huge build and the heavy pseudo-armor he's wearing beyond a slight adjustment of balance, but Vanko flies, slamming into a concrete wall like a ragdoll.

The coils, still thrumming with more electricity than the average suburban home, fall to the ground as Andy walks towards his fallen enemy to tear the homebrew arc reactor out of his chest, and Tony sees that underneath the ruined skin of Andy's arm, there is blackened metal.

* * *

><p>"Mutant, cyborg, or robot?" Tony asks as soon as they're back at the Malibu house.<p>

Andy tilts his head, even as he continues bandaging his arm, hiding the electrical burns from sight. "Android. Lab grown hair and skin, completely organic."

"Android Andy. I continue to amaze myself." Tony sips at his shake of green bleh. "And I made you. In the future."

Andy nods as he finishes with the bandages. "Yep."

"What's your AI?" JARVIS is taking notes.

"Hybrid between human brain patterns and JARVIS's learning pattern."

"Huh. Evil robots?"

"You apologized for that."

"Skynet?"

"Hasn't betrayed the government yet."

"Arc reactor?"

"Cleaner model, but yeah." Andy says, even as he peels the skin away from his chest like there's a zipper in there, revealing a gun metal black ribcage housing a mess of mechanical parts and in the center...

Tony looked at the arc reactor. Different design, that was the first obvious thing, but it was… brighter. Still blue, still round, obviously different core, but it was a wonder how it didn't glow through Andy's skin. "And that runs on Starkium." He asks, even as he directs JARVIS to take a look at it.

Andy giggles and nods. "Yep, and you're going to use it until you invent it yourself." He grins. "A palladium reactor should last me until you invent Starkium."

Tony gives it and Andy a look. "How old are you?"

"Five years. Android, remember?" He gestures at his reactor, his heart. "Well?"

Tony frowns, but accepts in the end.

Even after the first Starkium arc reactor was replaced by one of his personal manufacture, he kept the first one, the dully glowing circle becoming the next piece of a growing pile of evidence that Tony Stark had a heart.

* * *

><p>Agni sat at one end of the couch while Andy sat at the other end. The TV sat in front of them, open to Netflix while the remote sat in the middle of the couch. Silence reigned for a minute before Andy spoke.<p>

"The Iron Giant."

Agni scowled, clutching a pillow tightly. "The Black Cauldron."

"Pinocchio?" Andy squeaked.

"Black. Cauldron."

Tony jumped over the couch and landed between them, grabbing the remote smoothly. "Astro Boy."

"Understood, sir." JARVIS said as the movie began to play.

* * *

><p>S.H.I.E.L.D comes for Tony, trying to light a fire under him that he doesn't need. He's annoyed that one of his people was a spy, he's never liked spies even at the best of times, but he takes their bait. It's information, even if it's barbed information that they'll want to remind him of later when they need a favor. There's also the slight annoyance of Fury trying to tell him what to do, but, heck, everyone does that.<p>

And then they ask about Andy.

Tony made a point of looking out the window. "What about him?"

Fury gives him a 'stop playing stupid' look. "It's a robot. You might not be making weapons anymore, but you making machines that look and act like people is yet another a headache that I honestly don't want to deal with."

Tony snorts. "Says the man who throws about Life-Model Decoys like candy."

Fury's face didn't even twitch. "At least those don't come with falsified information declaring them actual people, Mr. Stark."

"Andy happens to be an 'actual person'."

"Yeah, an actual person who is as strong as one of your suits and has the personality of a golden retriever puppy. Goes right with the seven year-old girl who kills people." Fury looked unimpressed, though 'Natalie' takes a moment to blink at that nugget of information. "Get your act together, Stark, or we're going to have problems."

There were problems.

* * *

><p>Tony stared at the projector screen, even after the film had been done for several minutes.<p>

Greatest creation…?

Tony sighed.

Time for something else. He walked upstairs, ignoring Agent Coulson and Agni where they sat on the couch. He leaned on the piano where Andy was practicing.

"What can you tell me about Starkium?"

* * *

><p>Andy knows a bit, not all of it, as his dad hadn't seen fit to download the information into his brain. What he does know is that Howard Stark was a big believer in 'hidden in plain sight', which reminds Tony of something. The abrupt and uncalled for cuts in the video. The fact that the display case for the original model was called 'The Key to the Future'. It was as unsubtle as a brick to the face once one was in the loop.<p>

"Son of a bitch."

* * *

><p>Tony lets the kids help with destroying his house, even offering the sledgehammer to Agent at one point. He declined, even as Agni broke through the walls slated for death.<p>

"Were you built for construction work or something?" Tony asks Andy as he lifts up two sections of what Tony knows is very heavy equipment that will eventually turn into an accelerator. The android grins, and goes back to work, turning what should have been six or so hours of heavy lifting into one.

Tony looked at the new arc reactor proudly, flipping out Andy's for it. "Thank you, freakishly strong children of mine." He said, even as he felt the surge of power run through him. "Damn, what was yours at Andy, half empty? Gah, tastes like canned pineapple. Badly canned pineapple."

The android blanked for a second, a habit that Tony assumed was dedicating his processing power to accessing memory rather than imitating the thousand human quirks that kept him out of the uncanny valley. "15% power."

"Holy shit." Tony said. "You know what, fuck 'Starkium', I'm patenting it under 'Badassium."

* * *

><p>Legacy.<p>

Tony snorted at the thought at he looked out over the ruins of the expo. Yeah, as of now, wanton destruction pretty much was his legacy, the Stark legacy, and not amount of charisma or flashy moves could really hide it. Tony made weapons, even when his company didn't.

He sighed and then his phone rang. He picked up after the first ring. "Yes?"

"You okay, Dad?" Agni asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Okay, can you pick us up? We beat up some robots." The sound of something being torn to pieces in the background. "Andy is saving some people, but the fire department is here, so yeah, we wanna go before it gets awkward."

"Wait, what? You did what?"

Pepper smirked. "Welcome to my life."


End file.
